You’re worth more than gold:
Before you think you are worthless, melanin is $350 (US) per gram. Embrace your complexion cause you are so valuable.
Beatus Manifestationes,
Nomadic Mind Wanderer
No comments on #MelanatedMagicSeries #Day1
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THE PRELUDE:
I thought I was done after #jannotlongseries. However, my friend gave me the idea to have a series dedicated to black history month (US version). I thought it was dope, so I decided to take up the challenge.
P.S.
If you had enough of me, blame my friend! If you like it, blame me!Beatus Manifestationes,
Nomadic Mind Wanderer -
This is my mantra through challenging situations. I no longer see a difficult point in my life as negative, but as an opportunity to learn and grow within my life.
Pax et Felicitatem,
Nomadic Mind Wanderer -
You are the reason for the success/failures in your life! When you take full responsibility for that then things become easier.
Pax et Felicitatem,
Nomadic Mind Wanderer -
…In Grenada, I reconnected with my father, got the chance to do some significant reflections; which made me learn a lot more about myself, and I finally decided what I wanted to do career wise. After returning from Grenada, I started looking at masters or PhD programmes. I found this school and I knew that it was the school for me (its logo was an owl, I’ll expand in a later post), and coincidently I found a job in analytical chemistry that was 10mins away from where I lived. I applied to both, and I got accepted. Starting school was a bit more complicated as it was impossible to self-fund, but at the 11.9999th hour, things worked out, and I was able to start. During my panic mode for my masters, I started this blog!
I was scared to leave my job but was excited to start this new journey; when I started, it felt like the right decision, and I would be challenged. School felt the same way as well; however, I had a mass panic attack because I had a moment of doubt in myself. Lucky, I spoke to persons, and I felt better about the situation. This made me vow to be consistent with my assignments and review weekly; I stuck to my promise and did great in the first term(kudos to me)! Being at the school also allowed me the opportunity to partake in a workshop geared to helping persons with business ideas (for free).
During this year:
- I’ve met some fantastic people who called me out for enabling some shit;
- I realised that I should be around people/things that brought me joy. As a result, some interactions ended as quickly as it started;
- I realised that Christmas isn’t my thing so for upcoming years I would prefer to volunteer somewhere than getting fat during a meal;
- I will make more time for the people that are important to me;
- I’m way too talented to settle for any mediocrity in any aspect of my life.
The year brought about a shift from desiring the things I wanted most in my life to receiving them and made me proud to be my quirky self. I was brave enough to accomplish a lot and committed enough to keep working to maintain that standard. I am ready for what 2020 has to offer, and I am genuinely prepared to accept the greatness I am meant to accomplish.
PxF,
NMW -
Knowing your worth is being able to know when your body and mind needs rest!
Pax et Felicitatem,
Nomadic Mind Wanderer 😘 -
How you see yourself is based on how you allow others to treat you. So it’s time you really think about your value and put a “price tag” so no one can ever take you for granted again.
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Last year it finally stuck that consistency brought forth a successful outcome. I accomplished so much and started some of my longstanding goals. It is such a wonderful feeling knowing that I am not broken, just lazy. One day during my meditations, I realised that I have always been consistent; however, it was towards my bad habits.
I was consistent in NOT finishing my goals, holding onto negative emotions (hate, jealousy, anger, resentment, etc.), being lazy, self-doubt, and, the biggest of all, procrastination. I was so loyal to these negative aspects that I never linked it to the fact that it caused my stagnation. It was indeed my experience of Stockholm’s syndrome.
As I see it now, it was easy to be consistent with those traits because it felt safe, it was healthy for me, and I didn’t think I was strong enough to change. Now that I’ve demolished so many barriers since the year of 25, I’ve faced the negative aspects of myself and rewired my brain to understand the importance of being consistent and loyal to the right things.
It was a problematic process changing my mindset as there are so many distractions to revert me. Now that having a persistent mindset is more ingrained within me, it’s harder to go back to square one. I haven’t gotten to where I want to be as yet because it takes lots of self-dedication. However, every day I aim to increase my standards and get to that point. The hardest part was accepting responsibility for my results. Now that I overcame this hump, the journey became more natural for me.
No matter what stage you are in your life, you can get it right if you change your mindset and be consistent with the traits that will allow you to grow holistically.
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The first Thursday thought of the new month, the new year, the new decade should be about pushing yourself. Last year was about the realisation of self-worth, now this year is about utilising the potential. What goals are you starting (and continuing) this year? Hope this gives you the push to get it going.
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It’s a new year, and I usually like to have a theme to keep me focused as possible. Having a theme works for me because I like structure and organisation. Even though life laughs in my face, and I get some exciting twists having this mantra does help. At the end of the year, I assess whether the theme needs to be updated. Most times, all it needs is a tweak.
With lots of thought, I declare this year to be “The Year of Mass Holistic Expansion.” This means I will continue to do my best and allow myself to grow in all aspects without barriers.
For those who aren’t aware of my previous themes:
- 2019: The year of gratitude
- 2018: The year of new leaps
- 2017: The year of self-actualisation
- 2016: The year of self-acceptance
- 2015: The year of 24 – The disappearance of the rose-tinted glasses
Although this year will be “the year of mass holistic expansion,” I will continue to work on the previous themes. They were selected because I felt the need to work on those aspects of my life. Just because I have made massive progress doesn’t mean that I should completely forget them. Encountering these have brought about reflection and, guidance in selecting my subsequent theme. Wish you consistency, peace, hope and mass expansion!
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Dear 2019,
Letting go used to be so hard for me because I was petrified of what was coming my way. Taking the time to figure that out helped me to embrace all the unexpected encounters wholeheartedly. I’m no longer scared to let you go; I’m open to the new possibilities that will present itself to me. I’m ready for all the beautiful souls I will cross paths with to help me expand my thinking, the experiences that will aid in my growth to my best self.
You gave me lots and kept me busy. I’m grateful for all the experiences; the people I met, the conversations I had, the ability to wake up and face each day with hope and lack of monotony. I’m grateful for the push to start this blog and all the persons who supported me through reading the post and giving feedback. I’m thankful for reminding me that I have an ambitious spirit and continuously pushed me out of my comfort zones.
It’s been real, and thanks for everything! Even though I won’t see you again, you will always be apart of me!
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Let’s work on being better because our future selves depend on it.
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Photo by nappy on Pexels.com This post was inspired by a video I saw on Instagram which talks about “Post Traumatic Slave Syndrome.” It gives a brief explanation about why parents (descendants of slaves) behave the way they do. I found it quite insightful and helped me understand why I experienced certain things growing up as a child.
It’s no secret that how we behave stems from interactions with family, friends etc. What if these people were unaware of the traumas experienced by ancestors and classed their traits and mannerisms as cultural? What if they never learnt to question it? These behaviours would pass on and only worsen with each generation it encounters.
As a child growing up, I didn’t know the reasons for my parent’s practices; I only saw the outcome and wasn’t too happy about it. It was frustrating because I had so many questions but didn’t know who to ask, so I kept silent. Now that I’m working on healing from my childhood trauma, I now understand the reasons for their behaviour; it was based on survival. I am now more willing to forgive their actions and work on ending these patterns.
So here’s the video!
Lemme know your thoughts, I think it’s important that we start talking about generational curses and the effects so that we can heal from it.
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I have been MIA for a week, and I couldn’t be bothered. For those who know me; I am positive, productive, passionate and organised. I feel lethargic and want to sleep all the time. I usually feel this way around winter; when there is less daylight, and it’s cold. I thought I was going crazy, but other people suffer from Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD).
I didn’t think this was a thing for I always had warm temperatures in Grenada (over 23 degrees). When I first moved to NY, it was warm, and it was sunny, so things were good. Then it got to November; the temperature dropped considerably and daylight saving time reduced my contact time with the sun. Being at school during most of the day prevented me from getting sun, so I noticed I became more fatigued even though I did everything right.
I thought it was linked to my homesickness, so I ignored it. After winter passed and daylight saving time ended, and I became more energetic and happy. The second winter came, and the same thing happened; I thought this couldn’t be a coincidence. I did my research, spoke to my doctor, and it turns out it’s a thing. I never thought the sunlight could be so important to humans. Melanated people need the sun for vitamin D production as vitamin D aids in the production of melatonin which keeps people happy, among other things.
Now that I’m facing winter again: no sun means I’m at the lowest point in my productivity, so I’m faced with lack of energy. I try multivitamins, exercise, etc., but all I want to do is sleep and eat. Please forgive me if my blogs aren’t consistent. I’m trying my best to keep going. If you have tried anything that works, please pass along!
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self doubt can block you from reaching your goals.
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I was scrolling through Facebook and I was reminded about something I posted a year ago. It was a poetry project I had completed; I research the meaning of my names and wrote a descriptive paragraph about myself. Looking back at it now, I have to say that I have maintained the level of growth I wanted for myself. I have maintained:
- consistency
- self love/esteem/belief/confidence
- peace/sanity/joy/motivation
- my diet (what I consume in all aspects of my life)
- my energy and the steps needed to protect it
My Name: Unfolded
The lioness knew that the light within her would guide her through the midst of uncertainty. Her wisdom would assist those who had lost their strength along the way. She fought hard to maintain the honour and victory within herself, never ceasing to forget her rock. -
Photo by Dara Lorianne Pierre I was on my way to a workshop about ‘having an entrepreneurial mindset.’ When checking in, I found this button with the letter F. It was catchy and colourful, and I was instantly drawn to it. Without looking at the associated company, the first word I linked F to was FORWARD. FORWARD came to mind because it reminds me of my journey:
- How I kept pushing myself even though there were lots of barriers to the point where it became frustrating and confusing.
- How I kept creating a momentum even though I thought it was insignificant.
- How I never stopped entirely but kept cruising to my current point in life.
Also, when I think of Forward, Maurice Bishop comes to mind with the quote,
“forward ever, backward never”
He used this quote to inspire the country to obtain growth on various levels. This quote is so powerful that it shouldn’t only apply to nations, but people, as they are the ones that form a country.
Forward is being able to understand me enough to want to make changes/movements. Understanding myself comes from interacting with all situations that appear in my life — learning from every experience I encounter because I will adapt to my environment and consistently be creative.
Forward is always going irrespective to the progress I see from other people. Everyone is different, and as such, every movement is unique. So I never become discouraged when I see others going at ridiculous speeds. At times, It’s always good to take the scenic routes; I get to take in life and pick up some valuable lessons along the way.
F means forward to me, what does it mean to you?
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It’s all about a change of perspective!
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I am…
Ambitious, Adventurous
Beautiful, Benevolent
Creative, Curious, Confident, Complex
Daring, dapper
Empathetic, Enchanting
Formidable, fulfilled
Grounded
Happy
Interesting, Intelligent
Joyous
Knowledgeable, Keen
Lucky, Lionhearted
Mindful, Majestic
Nomadic
Open, Opinionated
Positive, Powerful, Passionate
Quirky
Resourceful, Rich
Successful, Sweet,
Thoughtful
Unparalleled
Victorious, Virtuous
Witty, Wise,
Xenial, X-linked
Youthful
Zappy, Zealous -
Photo by Dara Lorianne Pierre I took the time to get to know the “me” that has been tucked away so long behind all the fear, regrets and negativity. I wanna showcase the beauty of myself, when I finally decide to pay attention.
My list will continuously grow as the dating process is still happening. As of now, I can say that everyday I fall more in love with myself.
- If my heart is not with it, the flow of creativity will die.
- I need to give myself time to heal before I jump into something big.
- My parents raised me the best way they knew how to at the time.
- It was never my fault when people mistreated me because of their insecurities.
- Not everyone will like me.
- The decision I made felt right to me at the time.
- My stubborn ass should listen to the signs.
The Updated List:
- I’m excited about something it’s hard to sleep
- I’m passionate about animals
- I always try to make someone smile even when I’m not feeling my best
- I love travelling and interacting with adventurers
- I love volunteering
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I didn’t feel like I lived until I turned 25. I was so caught up in my insecurities and listened to other people that I never did want I wanted. I remember distinctively; I wanted to do a queen show. I got the form and filled it out but didn’t submit it because I persuaded not to do it. I also allowed fear to be a significant part of my life. There were so many times I wanted to do something, but I was scared. Then after the event, I would be filled with much regret that I played alternative scenarios my mind.
Then at 25, when the frontal cortex was matured, the lights came on. I was walking one day, and I asked myself “what are you doing?” I realised then I shouldn’t be bothered by what people thought and I should focus on what I wanted. This epiphany was concerning other heartbreaks as well. I guess being hard-headed is beneficial after all. I had to be and do me for my sanity. Now, I’m seasoned in this positivity and life is much better. I’m happier and attracting ambitiously conscious people in my life.
Pre 25 was excellent, but post 25 is much more liberating because I am not phased by the negativity, insecurity or immaturity of others. The colour on the rose-tinted glasses has been lifted, and I can see things for what they are. I learnt it’s all about protecting your energy and keeping people around that will help you grow. It’s hard to say goodbye; but seasons change, creatures evolve and stagnant water produces harm. If you aren’t there yet, start heading in that direction because your future self is waiting to be that beacon of light that shines constantly.
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During my introspection, the term ‘generational curse’ appeared a lot in my feed. It seemed like an entirely new concept as I couldn’t recall anyone speaking about it growing up. I did my research, but it was quite hard to find a proper definition. Based on what I read, I came up with this explanation.
Generational curses are misfortunes experienced based on negative traits inherited.
I heard the concept growing up. It was used to explain “why a person had a mental defect”, “experienced multiple miscarriages”, “involved in voodoo”, “poverty” or “experienced a karmic event”, to name a few.
I never thought much about it because it didn’t pertain to me. As I got older, I realise I was a victim on a smaller scale. I noticed that I deliberately sabotaged myself because I felt I wasn’t worthy to receive blessings. I often related these events to “not being my time” and continued coasting through life. I didn’t know better because I wasn’t taught better. Finding the root causes to heal was difficult, but I was able to categorise it into nature and nurture based.
Nature-Based:
I found out that descendants of slaves have modifications in how genes are expressed or suppressed in the body. Any trauma experienced by slaves tweaked how genes are regulated. This change can affect an individual on a physical, mental and spiritual level. Since descendants inherit DNA from their ancestors, all descendants acquire the change. This process is called Epigenetics. If you are not a descendant of slaves, the same theory can be applied if you had a traumatic event in your family’s history.Nurture-Based:
It can also be developed by learning during interactions and observations. For example, if you are taught that your skin tone, body or hair type doesn’t fit a “recommended standard” you will forever try to change yourself. If negative thoughts surround you, you will go through life with a defeated mindset and never allow your light to shine at its brightest.I’ve spoken to many people who’ve had these experiences. Therefore, I felt the need to write about this topic. The first step in growing is acknowledging that this problem exists.
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Be kind to yourself and be a cheerleader at every point in your life!
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Photo by Rakicevic Nenad on Pexels.com I recently started a new job; aside from being in the honeymoon phase, I feel the stark difference in motivation to power through my day. When I started my first job in the UK, I was quite intrigued as I was about to immerse myself in an entirely new culture. It was quite easy as everyone was so helpful because, at some point in their life, they were in a similar position. That job was great, but after a year, I wanted career stability, so I opted for a transfer.
From the moment I started my entire mood changed. It was an excellent opportunity; however, the level of toxicity I encountered wasn’t worthwhile. Some people felt stuck/frustrated, and it showed. Also, I felt unchallenged after a couple of months, so I bored most of the time. My boredom did land me a project, during which I realise I enjoyed validations and project management. When the project was over, I was back at square one, but it was a bit hard to leave because I bought a flat, so I didn’t have the option of a dramatic exit.
It was a struggle coming to work each day because I had the worse commute, I was unfulfilled, physically and mentally drained. I never thought I would be a person excited for the end of the day or the weekend. I took steps to apply for jobs and get out of my comfort zone. Within a couple of months, I found a role in my desired field, and it was close to where I lived. I’m happy I leapt because I have more time to focus on myself.
Your body always knows when its time to move on, but based on underlying fears; you choose to stay. I realise this level of change is not possible for everyone, but there are small things you can change to improve the outcome. At least try before you give up.
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Blogfessions of a Nomadic Mind Wanderer will be coming to you on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays*!!
*Unless it’s a special event!Tuesdays and Saturdays will be regular posts (whatever pops into my head)!
Thursdays will be #thursdaythoughts (memes, quotes, etc that resonated with me!)
I know I can do, it’s just a matter of planning it out. I’m glad you are on this journey with me!
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Growth is possible, you just need to know who you have to keep in your circle!
- The Inspired
- The Motivated
- The Open-minded
- The Passionate
- The Grateful
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I usually write about whatever pops into my head. There is an element of randomness I appreciate; I think it’s because I’m so spontaneous. About a week ago, I posted “I think it’s time” because it felt right. Then after posting “the art of calling out” I thought that I should repost “I think it’s time” cause it tied together so well.
I mentioned that I don’t call out people that much. However, there are times when someone you love is doing the most and slapping the stupidity out of them will get you arrested. So, you have to try a less physical approach.
I think we need to set the scene a bit.
PS:
The name in this post is fictitious, any stories in real life which bare any similarity is purely coincidently.
Yasmin has been in a situationship with a guy for ages. She makes promises to stop seeing him, but there is something that keeps luring her back (maybe the…). He never really cares until Yasmin is talking to other guys. She has ended so many potential relationships because she thinks he is serious this time. It lasts for a few weeks, and it’s the same drama again. Every time he breaks her heart, she gets sick because it stresses her out. I’ve spoken to her before, but she doesn’t listen. She is beginning to lose friendships because she thinks people don’t want to see her happy.
I love you, so I KNOW you need to hear this:
I’m tired of giving you too much of myself with no appreciation.
I’m tired of having to constantly listen to you without you acknowledging the impact of your negativity.
There comes a time in life when you need to realise that your choices affect people in your radius.
Your naivety is restricting access to your common sense.
I know you know better cause I’ve seen you accomplish goals before.
I pray that you break free from the shackles of the generational curses.
You need to understand the correlation between the energy you attract and the negativity you encounter.
I try to be there for you without thought, but you are draining me.
I can feel your discord from the time I pick my phone.
I know you are lonely, but you can never be alone after you’ve made peace with yourself.
It’s not that hard if you make an effort, but you need at try.
It’s not me; it’s you. Until you realise it’s you, you’ll always consider yourself to be Atlas.
Nomadic Contents 