Now that I am in my 30s, I value peace so much more. It took me a while to consider peace as a good thing. I grew up seeing the hustle culture, being told that the only way to succeed is to work without end. Come to think of it, I don’t think I saw any of my elders resting aside from regular nights’ sleep. If you feel physical rest was bad, mental rest was worse. Worrying was normalised, and they were constantly in survival mode. That truly negatively impacts the mind and body over time. 

Growing up, everything felt loud; there was not much time to think and internalise your thoughts unless it was before bed. For me, I constantly experienced loud speaking, loud talking, loud egos. If compliments were given, they didn’t feel genuine, and people were ridiculed for making an effort or trying to improve themselves. It didn’t felt very clear because even though it didn’t feel right, that experience was normalised.

About nine years ago, I felt the need to let go of this internal battle. I made time to reflect on my actions, reactions and behaviours and how my childhood may have impacted my current thinking. I explored therapy and spoke about things that felt normal to suppress and ignore. Then, with time, I started to realise the joy of having peace. I didn’t worry about situations, I stopped taking things personally, and if someone didn’t like me, I began to be okay with their opinion of me. The most important thing was that I unconditionally loved myself and saw the beauty I had to offer in the world. 

There are so many more things I have done, and I will aim to explore them later. It has not been an easy road, and I have gone off path so many times (so many times). However, it is essential to persevere if this is something fundamental. Knowing peace was paramount, so I made the effort to keep going. I am sure if you want peace, you can do it too!